Last Updated on January 5, 2023 by Mike Robinson

The people with emotional intelligence have a set of related perception, management and control of your emotions and feelings and those of other skills. A part of these skills may come genetically configured but most, you can learn them during your first years of life and even perfect them years later.

Have you ever considered yourself if you take advantage of your emotional intelligence? Here I leave you ten skills that you can develop to increase your IE and  that will be very useful in all the situations of your life.

Emotional Intelligence

1. Emotional Skills

• You have self-awareness, that is, you know how to identify, perceive and express your emotions and feelings, and also those of others. In addition, you are able to identify emotions in sketches, works of art, architecture, through language, sound, etc.
• Understanding and @nalysis of emotions. You know how to put a name and value your emotions and feelings. You spend some time @nalyzing situations and identifying the emotions you’ve experienced, and you do it automatically (is this a new emotion? Have I experienced this before? How do I feel?). All this makes you understand and better know yourself and others.
• Regulation of emotions. You have the ability to be open to any emotion or feeling, and you can tolerate them regardless of whether they are good or bad. You know how to approach or distance yourself from these feelings or emotions depending on whether you agree or not. Finally, you take advantage of these emotions and feelings by mitigating the negative and intensifying the positive ones.

2. Verbal and non-verbal communication skills

When you have emotional intelligence you can express your emotions and feelings properly, as well as express the needs related to these feelings. You have a rich emotional vocabulary.

You also have body language skills (you know how to identify precise or imprecise, honest or dishonest expressions, etc.). All this will help you communicate with others in all facets of your life.

3. Social Skills

You know how to relate to others. Assertiveness and active listening play an important role here. If you have developed your emotional intelligence, you are assertive, that is, you know how to defend your opinions and rights without attacking or offending those of others. Also, you can practice active listening

By seeing the other person that interests you what he is telling you, making it clear that you have understood his message.

These two qualities, active listening and assertiveness, are vital for satisfying social relationships and for avoiding or managing conflicts with others.

4. Empathy

This ability is very close to the previous ones. You have empathy when you understand and feel what other people feel.

You know how to put yourself in the place of others experiencing their same emotions and feelings. This will make it easier for you to connect with others. It is a vital skill for the psychologist since patients need to feel understood.

5. Motivational skills

You know how to set clear, specific and meaningful goals and you have enough capacity to achieve them. This is what we call “self-motivation” and it is a fundamental requirement for personal success and positive mental health.

The strength and energy you get from self-motivation makes you optimistic and surround yourself with positive things. Which means that you achieve your goals more easily and quickly and, therefore, you are happier and have a fuller and interesting life.

6. Self-control

You have control over your emotions and feelings. You know how to reduce your negative thoughts and increase the positive ones. You can also control your impulses and behavior.

This makes you a balanced, persevering and stable person (normal life, routine, enough hours of sleep, free time after work, you strive to get what you want …) and all this makes you have your life under control.

7. Stress management and problem solving skills

Stress is a reaction mechanism that we have all people and that is activated when a problem appears for which we do not have enough resources. This is necessary since it allows us to be prepared to respond quickly. The problem appears when this mechanism is always activated.

If you have developed your emotional intelligence, you will be able to tackle these stress situations by applying one or more coping strategies (distancing, confrontation, seeking social support, etc.), which will allow you to better solve your problems.

It is important to mention the vital role that the techniques of relaxation and meditation ( Mindfulness ) play in this ability, since the daily practice of  these makes you handle your problems and stress situations better.

8. Adaptability

You have the ability to cope with changes, new situations, and other pressures that can occur in your life.

This makes you a flexible person and gives you the ability to respond efficiently to any situation that is present, adjusting your behavior according to the needs of the moment.

9. Innovation, creativity and curiosity

It is related to adaptability, since to be able to face situations of change, you have to innovate, since the answer or strategy to use will not always be the same.

The fact of innovating makes you a creative and curious person because it makes you develop your imagination, explore new possibilities and have an open mind.

10. Independence and decision-making

The development of emotional intelligence also makes you an independent person since, as mentioned, EI provides you with sufficient resources to deal with any problems that may arise in your life.

Having these resources makes you have more confidence in yourself and your judgments, making it easier for you to make decisions.