If you had to meet new people now with the goal of making new friends, how would you do it? How would you approach them? And what strategies would you use to maintain that relationship over time?
Maybe through these questions you have realized that you are untrained, that you lack skills to meet people, and even, practice in establishing new relationships and, above all, to maintain them.
How to meet new people
Or you may have realized that you have never had such skills, that is, you have never been able to make friends or keep them.
No matter what your case, do not worry, throughout this article I will provide you with strategies so that you can make new friends.
Most of the friendships are achieved in childhood, adolescence and early adulthood, mainly in the school, in the institute, in the neighborhood and in the university, although you can also find friends in other areas such as work.
There are many reasons why a person may want to expand their social circle, such as:
- Do not have friends, only known.
- Let him feel alone and want to change his situation.
- That he is not satisfied with his social life and wants to improve it.
- You have lost your friends for a discussion or for any other reason.
- That with the passage of time he has distanced himself from his friends.
- Let your friends have paired and just make plans for couples.
- That he has been separated or divorced and as a result he has lost contact with the friends that the couple had in common.
- Want to expand the circle of friends by incorporating new friendships.
- I want to meet new people who contribute something different.
- Have specific hobbies and want to meet people who share them.
- Have you moved from neighborhood, city or country and not see them so often.
- Let it be Erasmus and do not know anyone there.
As you can see, there are many and varied reasons that can lead a person to want to expand their social circle.
And you? Do you identify with any of the reasons given?
It is necessary to emphasize that people are beings that tend to socialize by nature, but that this condition can be seen modified by different factors.
One of these factors is the fact that we have moved from living in small towns and municipalities where everyone knew each other and helped each other to live in big cities and towns where we do not even know our neighbors.
We have changed a calm, calm rhythm of life, where there was a strong feeling of community and help, a frenetic pace of life and an individualized lifestyle where the other is a simple unknown about which we are not interested.
All this has impacted on social relationships, causing many people to feel alone despite living surrounded by people, and is that loneliness is the disease of the twenty-first century.
When you are a child, teenager or young person it is easy to create new friendships, but as you grow older it becomes a more difficult task.
Over time people become more reluctant to develop new social relationships with other people because they already have their lifelong friends.
But what about all those people who have no friends and are adults?
10 Tips for meeting new people
First, I’ll explain 5 ways you can increase your chances of socializing and talking to new people by 100. There are many ways to get new friends, such as:
I’m sure you use the internet every day, like most of the population, whether to work, to entertain, to buy … and from now on you can also use it to meet new people.
On the internet there is a great variety of web pages where you can meet many very interesting people.
I am not referring to the pages of flirting that are so much advertised in the media, but to other types of pages that aim to organize leisure plans for unknown people to know each other.
In this way, you can go to the cinema, the theater, museums, field trips or any other type of activity with people looking for the same as you: new friends.
Internet is a very useful tool to contact and meet people with the same interests or who are in your same situation. Cheer up!
- Collective activities
Performing some kind of group activity or group class, such as going to the gym, dancing classes, a cooking course or join a group of hiking, is a good opportunity to meet new people and create friendships.
It will be easier for you to interact with other people, and you will feel more comfortable, if you perform an activity that really interests you, so if you have always wanted to carry out some kind of activities but have not yet done so, now is the time!
Once you meet your classmates, you can propose to take something at the end of the class, organize some group activity related to your interests, a Christmas dinner or an invisible friend. Any excuse is good for relationship.
Most likely, there are several organizations that carry out some type of volunteering with which you can collaborate, whether in a food bank, a neighborhood association or a similar activity.
It is also possible for your district to organize group activities for which they need volunteers, such as the organization of parties in the neighborhood, exhibitions in the cultural center, charity events …
Find out about all the possible ways to volunteer and get involved, it’s a good way to meet new people while doing social action that is favorable to your community.
Having a pet, such as a dog, can help you a lot when it comes to generating new friends. Taking your dog around the area or park where your neighbors do, will make it easier to establish conversation with them, and parties with the advantage that you already have a common theme: your pets.
Take advantage of this topic to start a conversation: what is your dog’s name, how old is it, what breed is it, where did you adopt it…
There will come a time when, if you take your pet every day at the same time and in the same area, you are always with the same people with whom you have the possibility of forming a friendship.
- Friends of your friends
Surely your friends, acquaintances or relatives invite you from time to time to dinners, parties and outings with other groups of people you do not know, with the friends of your friends.
These kinds of opportunities are perfect for meeting your goal of relating to new people. Do not let them pass by the shame that you can have, the laziness that you leave or any other similar type of excuse. Come to the event, relate and enjoy.
After explaining the activities you can do to socialize more, I will explain how you can act to strengthen relationships and make friends.
How can you make new friends?
There is an essential factor when it comes to making new friends: attitude.
The attitude is decisive when it comes to interacting with others, regardless of the situation you are in, so if you want to be successful when starting new friends you must have a cheerful, positive and open attitude.
Through this attitude you transmit to the other that you are a sociable, predisposed, natural person and that you trust in yourself and your abilities.
And, as you can deduce, when it comes to relating this attitude is more favorable than if you show withdrawn, shy, embarrassing or nervous.
So let go of embarrassment, shyness and fear of being rejected, and trust yourself and your abilities, for it is the only way to achieve your goals.
Aside from the attitude you have, there are other factors that will help you meet new people. These factors are:
- Choosing the Right Place and Time
When starting a conversation with a stranger you must be able to choose the right place and time to do it.
When it comes to starting a conversation, it is very important that the two people have some time to talk, in this way, the chances of developing a friendship increase.
- The presentation
This step may seem very basic and irrelevant, but it is very necessary in a first contact.
On many occasions you may approach a stranger by asking him or her directly about a topic, without having made a previous presentation, which may cause the person to consider you someone impolite and impolite.
To avoid such misunderstandings, which tend to make difficult the subsequent conversation, it is best that you present yourself politely saying your name and asking the other for yours.
This first approach is a facilitating step to continue talking about where you are, the activity that you are going to carry out…
- Start a conversation
After the presentation, it is necessary to start a conversation, thus avoiding to remain silent after knowing the name of the other person.
To make this step easier, you can start by asking the other about what you have in common, that is, about the situation in which you are, about the activity you are going to carry out, about the acquaintances you have in common …
For example, if you are doing some kind of volunteering you can ask the other person how long you have been collaborating, how you knew the organization, if you have collaborated in another type of volunteerism, if you live in the area…
When it comes to dialogue, it is very important that the questions you ask are not closed, that is, that the person does not have to answer yes or no, but are open for the other to have a more elaborate response that gives rise to continue the conversation.
- Maintaining the conversation
It may be that your difficulty is not in initiating a conversation or in asking the other for what unites you, but in maintaining that dialogue in time.
For that first contact to continue, you must listen carefully and show interest in what the other person is telling you to feel heard and comfortable talking to you.
In fact, at first it is preferable that you listen more than you speak. Listening to the other person you will find information on which to deepen, new topics to talk about, things you have in common, things that separate you…
If at any point you stay blocked or do not know how to continue the conversation:
- Dig deeper into some subject that you have previously spoken superficially.
- Give your opinion on something that you have talked about a while ago, generating a new dialogue.
- Or bring out a new topic of conversation. The more closely related you are to what unites you, the easier it is for the person to talk.
- End the conversation
If you see that the conversation you are having with the other person is going to end, either because the class that you have attended, the social meeting in which you are or just because someone has to leave, is dismissed.
Try not to leave a place without saying goodbye to the people you’ve been talking to, since the farewell is just as important as the initial presentation.
If you want to see that person again I recommend that when you say goodbye, ask him if he will return next week to class or if he can give you the phone number or his name to look for him in a social network and to stay again.
There is a chance that the person will tell you know, since not everyone is willing to make new friends.
Do not worry, do not be ashamed or afraid of rejection and try it. In case the person says no, keep trying to meet new people in other environments, places, meetings … do not give up!