Even though the gay community is all about love, feelings of isolation and severe loneliness are actually quite common. Many people struggle with making friends or love connections and most people find that they typically feel as though they’re all alone, despite being surrounded by people. This is because it is difficult to make a real connection with another human and we will now look at how you can deal with being lonely and live a much happier life.
Why do homosexual males feel so alone?
Unfortunately, loneliness is very much part of being gay. This is because most gay men are in the closet from the outgo due to society’s assumption that everyone is straight or heterosexual. There is so much stress in having to hide the fact that you’re gay, it truly takes a toll on your mind. For most gay people, before they even realize they’re gay, they will come to the understanding that they won’t be able to live a typical heterosexual life. As a result, you will likely grow up feeling as though you’re separate and different from everyone around you.
Unfortunately, once you come out of the closet for yourself and to the public, your life won’t typically improve immediately. It doesn’t matter where you live, you’ve probably experienced homophobia from the people around you such as your family members, friends, acquaintances, etc. This is what is known as minority stress and it is more harmful and destructive than most people may think. One of the causes of this problem is due to toxic masculinity where gay men believe the negative traits of masculine males. As a result, they may try to be emotionally detached, which causes a great amount of additional psychological damage. There are even specific groups of gay men that are actually disliked and discriminated against the inside of the gay community. This then serves to cause more psychological issues which lead to problems such as bad self-esteem and a poor body image. There are many spaces for members of the LGBT group such as clubs and Grindr which is a hookup app. However, these don’t help to foster strong or close relationships but only quick sexual encounters that have no benefit from the emotions of gay men. As a result, gay men typically feel so alone even though the gay community is seen to have a family-type aura. So, if you’re having these problems, how can you deal with them?
The significance of coming out of isolation
These negative emotions of isolation and loneliness typically lead to even more negative issues such as anxiety, substance abuse, severe depression, and even suicide. As a result, you need to find a way to genuinely connect with other humans as a gay man.
Unfortunately, there are many gay men who are substance abusers since they typically feel these substances such as alcohol, crystal meth, cocaine, etc actually help them to interact with others more freely. However, by using these type of substances, it will lead to addiction and dependence which then takes over your life. So, now that we have covered how and why gay men feel so alone and isolated, we’ll now look at 5 ways that can help you to deal with it.
1. First, in order to get help and get better, you need to be able to admit to yourself and others about your loneliness and other negative feelings you may have. You should try to be as honest as you can since this will actually help to reduce these feelings. As a matter of fact, just by reaching out for help can aid you in creating better relationships and you will see that there are people who care about you.
2. Next, you should join support groups and various clubs that meet up on the regular. Once you see these people regularly, it will be easier for you to become friends with them. Gay phone chat lines can be a good place to meet people too
3. If you have any acquaintances, you should make the effort to reach out to them and get closer to them. Most people don’t do this and it takes some effort, but it will be worth it since you can potentially create a deeper connection and true friendship.
4. If you are abusing any substances, then you should definitely get some help. Even though using these substances makes you feel good, they only do so for a short while and in the long term, they will make you feel worse and even lonelier. There are many support clubs such as the AA and NA which have meetings in most cities specifically for LGBT groups and you should try to attend them.
5. Next, another good idea is to find a gay-positive therapist since they can help you to work through any psychological problems. They will help you to deal with your emotions and help you to gain self-esteem and your confidence. You can even attend group therapy where you can meet gay men who are also dealing with the same issues.
So, whether you know or believe it, there are lots of amazing people out there who want to become friends with you. Be sure to follow the above tips which will definitely help you to deal with your loneliness and ensure you make lots of new connections.